I have had some very good critical advice from an expert called Hilary Johnson who kindly spent quite some time writing her thoughts to me in an e-mail, after I wrote to her seeking it. She didn't pull any punches, which is a good thing, as it wouldn't be worthwhile if she was just being polite. I had thought of copying her letter here as it might help to remind me to strive hard to be better, and to get beyond the difficulties she highlighted, but I might wait to see if I hear from her again, and ask her if she minds me making her advice publicly available.
I had some other advice last night, which I am very interested in. Two friends think I should perform (read) my rhymes onto videos and put them on U-tube. This would be a great fun project, and one of them has offered me a special mini-movie camera to use. I can do it from lots of different locations, the cab of my truck, for instance. I'm quite excited about the idea. I know it is supposed to be easy, but I have no idea how to do it. Hopefully I will find out and get it right.
Number 24.
A couple behind at the moment, as it is now Monday 21st May. This is based on a story in the news today, where three women were thrown out of a cafe for refusing to stand up during the National Anthem. But you knew that already. I might amend it a bit, as I do sometimes to any and all of my rhymes if I see a way of improving them.
Not Amused!
Someone enamoured of the Queen,
(And all the Royal lot), has been
And set up in this Jubilee year,
A Royal themed tea shop, I hear.
Called Royal Tea, (a painful pun)
This place, or so I’m told, is run
By someone who is, oh so clever,
To gather more royal junk than ever!
Indeed perchance if you should look,
You’ll find them in the Guinness book.
They have the record size collection,
Documenting their affection.
Perhaps they are a bit demented,
Clinging to a class, lamented
By other folk who plainly see,
They’re people just like you and me.
Privileged, anachronistic,
Lives completely unrealistic;
Your Royal Highness, just how high?
And Majesty? Exactly why?
Highness, lowness, we must bow
In awe of Majesty, but how
Can anyone have that much worth,
Superior simply by their birth?
Anyway, each day at three,
A so called custom after tea,
(And quite sincerely they mean),
Is to play God Save The Queen.
Everyone must leave their seat,
And standing tall be on their feet,
To pay allegiance and salute,
In silence; conversation mute.
But there are those who don’t subscribe;
Republicans you might describe,
And three who were redoubtable
Found themselves chuck-outable!
For if you venture here within,
Committing anti-royalist sin,
Reception here will be quite chilly,
Even though it’s rather silly.
Out you go, out on your ear!
Your type’s not very welcome here.
Your disrespect for Royalty,
Is something we don't want to see!
But you have done the place a favour;
Even if the bill they waiver.
Everyone’s heard of them now;
Their Royal Family cash cow!
Someone enamoured of the Queen,
(And all the Royal lot), has been
And set up in this Jubilee year,
A Royal themed tea shop, I hear.
Called Royal Tea, (a painful pun)
This place, or so I’m told, is run
By someone who is, oh so clever,
To gather more royal junk than ever!
Indeed perchance if you should look,
You’ll find them in the Guinness book.
They have the record size collection,
Documenting their affection.
Perhaps they are a bit demented,
Clinging to a class, lamented
By other folk who plainly see,
They’re people just like you and me.
Privileged, anachronistic,
Lives completely unrealistic;
Your Royal Highness, just how high?
And Majesty? Exactly why?
Highness, lowness, we must bow
In awe of Majesty, but how
Can anyone have that much worth,
Superior simply by their birth?
Anyway, each day at three,
A so called custom after tea,
(And quite sincerely they mean),
Is to play God Save The Queen.
Everyone must leave their seat,
And standing tall be on their feet,
To pay allegiance and salute,
In silence; conversation mute.
But there are those who don’t subscribe;
Republicans you might describe,
And three who were redoubtable
Found themselves chuck-outable!
For if you venture here within,
Committing anti-royalist sin,
Reception here will be quite chilly,
Even though it’s rather silly.
Out you go, out on your ear!
Your type’s not very welcome here.
Your disrespect for Royalty,
Is something we don't want to see!
But you have done the place a favour;
Even if the bill they waiver.
Everyone’s heard of them now;
Their Royal Family cash cow!
© Stephen Saunders
My wife thinks I need a haircut, but after the last rhyme she is concerned that I could get the whole lot done at once, off at the neck.
To book Steph'nonsense for a rhyming evening:
bowleyfarm@gmail.com or 01428 741212
Agent / publisher wanted.
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