Wednesday 9th May.
Long day at work today, driving the truck in London. I heard something on the radio which struck a chord. Alice Arnold reacted to seeing a bottle thrown from the window of a car.
The Skunk. (Number 16).
Alice was driving in London today,
Enjoying the sights and the sounds
Of the city streets in a rainy May,
As she persevered with her rounds.
Stuck in traffic she patiently waited,
Tapping her hands on the wheel,
When she suddenly saw something she hated;
Something small, but to her a big deal.
From the open window of the driver in front
A plastic bottle was hurled;
A careless gesture, but quite an affront
To Alice’s idea of the world.
Which child is taught that to litter is good,
And the place for such stuff is the road?
Who likes to live in a neighbourhood
Where detritus is all a la mode?
Alice leapt out and picked up the bottle
While no-one had moved very far.
Before the offender had got on his throttle
She chucked it right back in his car!
The man was surprised, and quite taken aback
That a woman would dare to confront
His alpha male status as he sat his hack,
And he managed no more than a grunt.
But he nearly jumped out to use brawn where his brain
Wasn’t quite up to the job;
But a crowd cheered on Alice as she stood in the rain,
And they appeared quite a threatening mob.
He wound up his window and stuck it in gear,
Then spun the car round in the street.
He raced away with their shouts in his ear
And the bottle of shame at his feet.
Not everyone’s brave quite like Alice,
Even if we are moved to react.
But to teach them a lesson’s not malice,
And they need to be told, that’s a fact.
So next time you follow a van or a truck
And the driver ejects all his junk,
Telephone the firm and with luck
The owner will deal with the skunk!
Alice was driving in London today,
Enjoying the sights and the sounds
Of the city streets in a rainy May,
As she persevered with her rounds.
Stuck in traffic she patiently waited,
Tapping her hands on the wheel,
When she suddenly saw something she hated;
Something small, but to her a big deal.
From the open window of the driver in front
A plastic bottle was hurled;
A careless gesture, but quite an affront
To Alice’s idea of the world.
Which child is taught that to litter is good,
And the place for such stuff is the road?
Who likes to live in a neighbourhood
Where detritus is all a la mode?
Alice leapt out and picked up the bottle
While no-one had moved very far.
Before the offender had got on his throttle
She chucked it right back in his car!
The man was surprised, and quite taken aback
That a woman would dare to confront
His alpha male status as he sat his hack,
And he managed no more than a grunt.
But he nearly jumped out to use brawn where his brain
Wasn’t quite up to the job;
But a crowd cheered on Alice as she stood in the rain,
And they appeared quite a threatening mob.
He wound up his window and stuck it in gear,
Then spun the car round in the street.
He raced away with their shouts in his ear
And the bottle of shame at his feet.
Not everyone’s brave quite like Alice,
Even if we are moved to react.
But to teach them a lesson’s not malice,
And they need to be told, that’s a fact.
So next time you follow a van or a truck
And the driver ejects all his junk,
Telephone the firm and with luck
The owner will deal with the skunk!
© Stephen Saunders
Not long ago I was following a truck with the company name and phone number emblazoned on the back doors. The driver hoiked the wrappings of his lunch out of the window as if it was the only thing one would do with it. If he had thought for one second that there was anything wrong with doing it he would surely have waited till he didn't have anyone behind him. It was a lot of stuff too, Coke can, McDonald's wrappers, crisp packet, that sort of thing. I simply rang the number on his truck and suggested to the company representative who answered that they might educate the driver of the truck whose registration I was able to provide as it was right in front of me. Job done. I recommend everyone do it. It is unlikely to lose a driver his job, unless it happened a lot, but it will chastise him. How am I driving? Well actually...!!
To book Steph'nonsense for a rhyming evening:
bowleyfarm@gmail.com or 01428 741212
Agent / publisher wanted.
No comments:
Post a Comment