Thursday 12 July 2012

Number 61. What to do about Dangstein House?

What to do about Dangstein House?

I met an architect today,
A lovely lady I might say;
She’s bought herself an ugly pile,
Built without regard for style.
A giant heap of bricks it was,
Made to replace a total loss,
Back in the nineteen thirties when
A manor house burned down, and then
Someone who didn’t care at all,
Simply made it big and tall.
No thought about aesthetics, nor
That it makes someone's eye sore!
So now my new found lady friend’s
Thinking how to make amends.
I told her that the spot was great,
And somewhere perfect to create
A Georgian mansion that could be,
Built with classical beauty.
But of course I had forgotten,
Architecture has gone rotten!
Looking backwards will not do,
(Though it may be a perfect view).
Anything this woman makes,
Modern will be, for Heaven’s sakes!
Like a mantra, architects
Spout what their tutors expect;
‘Be sure to always make it new,
Edgy, funky, space age too;
Make your mark, make it bold,
Don’t build anything like old!’
Corbusier, I pointed to
Example of what not to do;
His brutal places all have damned,
Poor residents who have been crammed,
Into his ugly blocks that no
Architect would ever go
To live themselves, though they don’t care
If others have to live in there.
She told me that she is a fan,
Corbusier was a great man!
He moved design further ahead
Than many others live or dead!
It’s just unfortunate that he,
Did some other things that we
Would rather that he hadn’t done,
That screwed up things for everyone.
He thought it would be really neat,
If people had nowhere to eat!
In his flats you had to share,
A kitchen with the others there.
This was meant so that you would,
Have a friendly neighbourhood!
But it didn't work of course,
Friendliness you cannot force,
The kitchens ended up abused,
Very much like public loos!
Brutal is the name of style,
That he fashioned for a while;
The one he is so famous for,
The style we don't want any more.
Synonymous with Communism;
Not a welcome proposition!
MacDonald’s is another one,
Think what this company has done;
Taking eating so much further,
Revolutionised the burger!
Corbusier is just the same;
Good things he gave us in his name?
I cannot really think quite what,
But she was sure it was a lot.
I told her it was mostly bad,
Like every Big Mac that I’ve had.
Architecture is like art,
Except we cannot live apart.
Modern installations might,
Stay in showrooms out of sight
Of those who do not want to see,
The childish efforts that they be.
But buildings are a different case;
You cannot miss them in their place;
Ones you love and ones that suck
In the street for years are stuck.
There's no choice for you and me,
For evermore it's there to see.
Until with luck it is replaced,
Or maybe simply gets refaced.
But no-one ever has complained,
That for years we have retained
Lovely buildings from the past,
Which for centuries will last.
Picture now some urban scenes;
Royal Bath or Milton Keynes?
Do I need to say much more,
About what aesthetics are for?
What’s the point of ever more,
Continuing to ignore
Lessons from the past that we,
By and large can all agree,
Got it right, built it well,
Lovely homes in which to dwell?
Of all the buildings we admire,
And those of which we never tire,
Almost every one is old;
This I thought she should be told.
Now here’s the thing I want to know;
Is there anyone can show
Me any modern house at all,
That one might say is beautiful?
Some are nice, some are cool,
Interesting, but beautiful?
Stunning when they are brand new,
Crappy in a year or two!
They do not stand the test of time,
Lose their lustre, gather grime,
Dirty concrete, rusty steel,
Paint that always seems to peel.
Sad is the word that I apply;
Most modern buildings by and by,
End up looking very dated,
And very many of them hated.
They are the ones that get pulled down,
Thankfully in every town.
But only after we have had,
To suffer all the really bad
Buildings that were foisted on us;
Those that were touted as a plus,
Cutting edge in nineteen sixty,
Supposed to make our eyes go misty,
So exciting, futuristic,
Ironically anachronistic,
Since their relevance is fleeting,
And the skyline they are cheating
Out of something great and lasting,
For the sake of just contrasting.
A great example I’ll give you;
Paris and the Pompidou.
I recommend you go and see
How it insults poor gay Paris!

© Stephen Saunders

To book Steph'nonsense for a rhyming evening:
bowleyfarm@gmail.com or 01428 741212

Agent / publisher wanted.



No comments:

Post a Comment