Jack Spratt.
Jack Sprat could drink no white,
His wife could drink no red;
And so betwixt the two of them,
They toddled off to bed!
Jack drank a bottle of red,
And Joan drank a white,
The pair of bottles, so they said,
Would do for them the night.
Several children they had had,
Over the course of time,
One or two had turned out bad,
And one or two just fine.
Jack Sprat loved his wife,
And Joan was fond of Jack,
He'd said he’d marry her for life,
If she would marry him back!
Jack Sprat was carrying her,
Home one evening drunk;
He dropped her as he clean fell over,
A newly felled tree trunk!
Says Jack, “ I think you’ve broken bones!”
His wife said, “That’s not so!”
“By now you ought to know that Joan’s
Immune to such a blow!”
“Stagger on my husband, please,
Get me to my bed,
Think not of sinking to your knees;
Get up and go instead!”
Jack hauled himself together and,
Gave his wife a shove;
The two of them went hand in hand;
The perfect pair in love!
© Stephen Saunders
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